—— Alphonse Allais
The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.
—— Richard Braunstein
If the headache would only precede the intoxication, alcoholism would be a virtue.
—— Samuel Butler
I'm like old wine. They don't bring me out very often, but I'm well preserved.
—— Rose Kennedy, (1890-1995) family matriarch, on her 100th birthday, 1991
I envy people who drink —— at least they know what to blame everything on.
—— Oscar Levant
I drink no more than a sponge.
—— Francis Rabelais, Works. Book i. Chap. v.
There's too much blood in my caffeine system.
—— Seen on a bumper sticker
Work is the curse of the drinking class.
—— Oscar Wilde
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